dearanonymousfriend

Ramblings from a would be writer

It’s a New Year…

Yes, it’s the third day of this new year.  No, I haven’t been celebrating for the past four days.   I am just now getting around to reading blog entries and deciding to write.

I have read blogs talking of new starts, new hope, blank slates.  All of them poignant and encouraging.  To be honest, this year, I haven’t done my usual inventory of the past year and I haven’t thought about this new year.  As cynical as it sounds, my thoughts have been wondering what all will happen this year.

Each year I have tried to look ahead.  I try to plan things I would like to do.  I don’t call them resolutions because I know by February I will have forgotten what I resolved to do.  I just like to make mental plans of what I could do during the year.

Except this year.  I haven’t a clue as to what this year holds.   I know whatever happens, with the grace of God, I will get through it.  The grace of God is what has gotten me through several years.  It is only by His grace, His care and His love that I am where I am.

A year ago today, if someone were to have told me that my hubby was going to be laid up throughout the summer and I would have to do the things I had to do this summer, I would have run screaming through our woods hoping to get lost and never found.  I would not have had the courage to go through this year.    I would have quit.  I wouldn’t have gone forward.

That’s the thing about not knowing the future.  We may not have the courage to proceed if we know what is in store for us.

So, as this year starts, I am sitting here wondering what this year will be like.  I wonder what I will be like this year.  I wonder what changes will happen.  How they will affect me.

Last night I made popcorn.  Not a remarkable event.  But, it was the first time I had made popcorn without our puppy underfoot.  As usual, I dropped some popcorn pieces as I was pouring it into the bowls.  I looked down and realized that for the first time in 16 years I had to pick that popcorn up.  There was no Shugo to scarf it down and beg for more.

This is just one example of how things have changed this past year.  Last year the thought of losing Shugo was a possibility, but by the end of the year, it was reality.

I am grateful for my faith in our Creator.  For, without that faith, that assurance of His care and protection of me, I could not face a new year that is unknown.  I know this is a different tone than my usual post, but, this is what is on my heart.  I face this new year, now, 362 days left in it.  I know I will write about it, cry over it, fight it, enjoy it and this time next year, Lord willing, I will look back and once more know who it was who actually got me through it.  Thank you Lord, in advance.     Happy New Year.

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Good-bye 2013…

I could wax on about the past year, but, having read through several of my posts from this year, I think you have already heard it from me.  So, I leave this year with a quote that I want to share with you.

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in.  A pessimist stays
up to make sure the old year leaves.  ~Bill Vaughan

There is an optimist in me and I look forward to 2014… but, there is also a big pessimist in me and I think I may have a broom in hand and sweep the floor around midnight!

Seriously, though, I pray for the new year.  May it be a year of health, wholeness, enough finances to stave off worry, laughter, moments that grab the heart with joy, and love of family and friends.  This I pray for those whom I have gotten to know in this blogging arena, and for my family and friends.  My life was enriched this year by you all and I look forward to more of the same in this new year.

God Bless you with a wonderful New Year.  Cheers!  DAF

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Reflections and memories…

The week before Christmas and New Year’s always brings a flood of reflection.  Each year, I sit and think about the past year.  I then think about the coming year.  I know most people do the same thing.  It’s good, I think, to remember where you were a year ago and what all has happened.

A year ago, we had just come home from seeing Little Man have his first Christmas.  We were filled with the hope of new year.  We were settled in our home and in our neighborhood.  All was well with the world.  Contentment and a wish to see things move forward.  Hubby going back to work and myself possibly finding a job.

Little did we know, a year ago, that this year was going to be one adventure after another.  We stayed settled and content for about 6 weeks.  We then found out we would possibly be leaving our neighborhood.  This started the unease in us.  Four weeks later we knew we would be moving, no possibility, just the fact.

This lead us to our current home.  We are settled, but not as comfortable as we were a year ago.  We wait for another shoe to drop.

This year has seen more illness, an injury, surgery, move, and change.  I am not big on change.  I like things to stay the same.

The other thing we have seen is Little Man growing up.  He is walking and talking and growing up into a fun little toddler.  He repeats words and says words on his own.  He is our joy and our delight.  He is full of life and reminds us to embrace life with the same enthusiasm.

Thinking on the next year, I have come to this conclusion.  We do not know what tomorrow holds.  We do not know where we will be this time next year.  We don’t know what adventures are in store for us this year.  This can be unsettling.  It can be scary.  But, this I do know, the Lord who kept me through this year is still on the job.  He is not going to leave me or walk away from me.  He will keep me.  He will be beside me through this coming year.

So, as I prepare to finish this year and head into a new fresh year, I am once more hopeful.  I will continue to lean on the One who has gotten me this far.

Have a great day, DAF

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Almost Jumping In

Today is the third day of this new year.  It is damp and a bit dreary here in the low country.  The rain has come several times today and it is a mixture of wanting to crawl into bed and stay there or just get busy.

I have accomplished some things today.  I have my dining room returned to normal.  Not a hint of last weeks decorations in sight.  It is refreshing to see it back to its plain normal setting.  My mantle in the living room is boasting a different set of accessories, and I am not certain it is going to stay that way.

I want a change.  Nothing major, just rearranging some things.  I think this is what is happening in my life now.  I have spent the past couple days trying to get excited about this new year.  It is like I am on the edge of wonderful pool.  It looks inviting and fun, but for some reason, I am running up to the edge about to jump and then I stop.

I know change is coming this year.  I knew it was coming at the end of last year.  I was thinking of it and preparing, and holding off to the new year.  So, now it is here.  I guess it came sooner than I wanted.  But, here it is and I am staring into the next few weeks and getting myself pumped up for the next season of our lives.

In another month I will reread this post and smile.  I will reconsider what this time was like and laugh at my hesitancy.  Change is always like this.  You see it coming and you balk.  But, on I go.  I will once more back up, look ahead and start to run.  Maybe soon I won’t stop at the edge but go for a big cannonball jump into the pool of the unknown.

Thanks for stopping by.  DAF

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