Fear and the Written Word…

Yesterday I commented on a blog that if the writer had found my writing mojo, please send it back to me.  I said it half in jest, half in truth.   Some may say I have had writer’s block, but, I think in truth I have just not written much out of fear.

The beginning of the month saw me take a huge step in submitting a couple of pieces of work for consideration for an online magazine.  Years ago, I would submit pieces without a second’s thought.  It was part of who I was and what I did.   Somewhere along the way, I stopped.  It wasn’t out of discouragement, as I thought with each rejection at least someone had read my words.   That in itself was a plus for me.   I think it was a healthy attitude, and I still do think it’s a great response for rejection of submissions.

There are many reasons I can rattle off for ceasing to submit pieces,  life got in the way, I started something else, I didn’t think it was worth the time, I got lazy, I rethought my priorities.    All of these could neatly fit into the reason I stopped.

But, personally, and if I am honest, fear is the reason I stopped.  Fear of inadequacy of saying what my heart is feeling and fear that it won’t resonate.   I do this with my blog and with my book.

Each Sunday, I silently pray during church services for strength and courage to write.   I pray about it daily, but somehow it’s those quiet prayers during service that speak to me.   Each Sunday I feel the prompting to just do it.   I leave confident and raring to go.  I get home and look at my laptop and freeze.

I was proud of myself for being obedient  and stepping out and submitting my works.   Yesterday I was supposed to hear if they were accepted.   I anxiously checked my email several times, hoping, but not expecting to hear anything.   I did not.  Am I discouraged?  Should I be?   That answer comes quickly, NO.   I know I did what I felt I needed to.

But, in thinking of this, I realized that my lack of writing mojo is fear of my written word.  It defines me, as what is written comes from deep within me.   So, yes, I have a fear of the written word, it is a reflection of me.  I have many wonderful people who read my words and encourage me, more than I could mention here.  I could not write without their encouragement and love.   This is a personal threat to me.  I put the phrase on my blog, “Ramblings from a would be writer”.     I think that needs to change.   I need to reflect what I write with how I see myself.  I need to see that brick wall of fear and either scale it or blow it to pieces, but, most of all I need it to be gone and get on with it.   Right?   So, once more, thanks for going through this with me.  Do you have a brick wall of fear in front of you?  How are you going to make it disappear?   I’d like to hear your thoughts.  And yes, I will change that little sentence to read, “Ramblings from a writer.” I will also remember that words on a laptop can easily disappear thanks to that little backspace key… so much easier than white out from the old days!

Thanks for stopping by today.   Cathi (DAF)

12 thoughts on “Fear and the Written Word…

  1. Thanks for the complete transparency. Most writers are not so open. Keep on keeping on, Cathi. You many never know how God is using your writings.

  2. Cathy, fear comes from many sources. Ourselves and of course the enemy of our soul. Everyone has fear. Mine has been Cindy. Fear of loosing her, not being able to take care of her. Yet God is there to help us through. It’s not the fear that defines us, but whether or not we give into it. Being able to write is a gift from God. Being rejected is hard on anyone. Yet any gift that comes from God the enemy will try to discourage you from using. Don’t give into the fear but continue to use your gift!!! God will use it has He see fit. You may never know the blessing you have been to others. You may never get published. Yet, you may have helped many on your way. I understand the fear but don’t let it take control. I have let it in days past, but God is helping me over come it. Keep writing and just trust God

  3. Thank you my dear brother, always there to encourage and correct when necessary. My prayers are with you and Cindy daily. I am always here to listen and pray. Love you both.

  4. I love your writing and know your fear. Published or not, I will continue to read. Stay safe in these unsafe times.

  5. I’ve been trying to put my “writer’s block” into words and you nailed it. My “writer’s block” is a massive wall of fear!
    I love your blog and how encouraging it is!

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